RD1

Chaz Hirata

28 January 2011

RD1

Ophelia Revived

We are fortunate to live in a country that has undergone immense changes in civil liberties.  The gender equality fought for by our predecessors has afforded women the ability to pursue their dreams without the constraints that hindered past generations.  While many women may experience some form of trauma between adolescence and menopause, there is no proof that this is a result of adjusting to their “gender roles.”  All human beings, both male and female, encounter various obstacles during their respective lifetimes.  While it can be acknowledged that some of these problems may vary based on gender, it is merely one of the many factors that influence our lives.

To say that gender roles handicap the women of today is inaccurate because it must be accessed on a case-by-case basis.  I believe that many women relish the opportunity to breakdown the longstanding stereotype that every man should be the breadwinner and every woman should be a homemaker.  The women of today are independent, often exuding poise and confidence far greater than their male counterparts.

For example, my cousin Alyssa was a prototypical “girly-girl” throughout her adolescence.  She was a social butterfly, attending every party and social event with no interest in sports or extra-curricular activities.  During her junior year in high school, the Interscholastic League of Hawaii (ILH) started a girls wrestling program and she decided to sign up.  Suddenly my petite little cousin was participating in one of the most physical and grueling sports in the world. 

When I first asked why she signed up for wrestling Alyssa admitted, “[Mostly] because all of my friends were doing it.”  While I was initially concerned by her choice of sport, I was not surprised that she excelled.  Wrestling gave her an added satisfaction and pride that shown through in other facets of her life.  To cap it off, she won the ILH 121-pound girls’ wresting title in her first year of competition.    

In her book Reviving Ophelia, author Mary Pipher describes adolescent girls as “saplings in a hurricane.”  As any parent learns, it is not just adolescent girls that have problems during puberty.  Young boys are faced with the same problems as they struggle to be accepted by their peers.  As a psychiatrist, Pipher has encountered scores of young women who she deems “moody and distant, elusive and slow to trust adults.”  Her portrayal matches just about every teenager in America, boy or girl.  By failing to account for the teenage boys who are prone to the same apprehension and unease that affects all adolescents, she embellishes the struggle of teenage girls to adjust to adulthood while ignoring their male counterparts.  

More to the point, it appears that Pipher rarely comes into contact with male clients.  Our society expects their men to be independent and strong-willed.  The thought of a young man going to therapy to talk out his problems would be ridiculed and laughed at.  As men, we are taught that true strength is taking care of problems alone and not asking for help.  We internalize our deepest feelings and emotions because of our fear of being labeled a “sissy” or a “panty.” For example, when parents see their daughter struggling to fit in, depressed, or despondent, they send her to a doctor or a psychiatrist to find out what’s wrong.  When they see their son in that same situation, do they send him to a psychiatrist as well?  Furthermore, Pipher’s data is flawed because as a psychiatrist, she is only dealing with troubled individuals in need of therapy.  Rarely would a happy, well-adjusted child be sent in for any type of counseling. 

As the time period between adolescence and menopause can be upwards of 30 years or more, it would be difficult to pinpoint gender role as a primary cause of trauma to women.  Gender role trauma represents the pressure we feel to conform to society in order to be socially accepted.  Those of us that fail to conform at a young age may open themselves up to ridicule and derision by their peers.  As we mature and become comfortable in our own skin, we realize that what makes us different is also what defines us as individuals. 

Whatever trauma we endure is experienced as human beings, not as men or women.  To say that females experience trauma adjusting to their gender roles makes light of the many other factors that could affect women today. Sengchanh Luanglaj explains, “Gender role trauma is caused when an individual experiences a struggle between the stereotypical expectations of what is acceptable in a certain society and culture.  The conflicting views between these two [could] cause the individual emotional and psychological trauma.” The gender roles of men and women are constantly changing over time. The bigger problem is, and always will be, the pressure to conform to these changes. 

Works Cited

Kojima (cousin). Personal interview. 26 January 2011. 6th edition. 

Luanglaj, Sengchanh. Online posting. 24 January 2011. Laulima Discussion. https://laulima.hawaii.edu/portal/site/KAP.XLSENG215js.201130/page/dce5cccd-f9ac-4ad1-8c6b-6896281bf756

Pipher, Mary. Saplings in the Storm Dialogues: An Argument Rhetoric and Reader. Gary Goshgarian and Kathleen Krueger. New York: Pearson-Longman, 2009. 425-432.